Doreen's World

am moving my blog to http://depressedmama.doreenpayne.net/ as the server keeps playing up here so could everyone go there from now on please.

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

its been raining here for two days and its great! so nice and cool outside not to mention wet! hope the rain keeps up for the rest of the week!

Lily is up and watching cartoons before school and Steffi is asleep of course. the cats are running around acting like they own the place.

did my first day of work experience yesterday and it was good! had fun and work wasn't too hard.

Life With Doreen

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

Steffi came home from Sydney - she got her photo taken with John Edwards and will post it tommorow - and Lily went off her face about 3 times. Lily is driving me up the wall completely at the moment! my meds are definately not working!

got my shoes and clothes for work experience at the nursing home - start next week. so at least got something done today. wish my depression would take a hike and go into remission or something though as it's driving me batty

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

Thanks to Group Beyond Blue member SoberToday who revised and edited this letter authored by Bek Oberin about HEP C to speak to those of us who live with depression and anxiety. You may read her discussion thread at Group Beyond Blue by clicking here.

Having depression and anxiety means many things change, and a lot of them are invisible. Getting help means many things as well, again most of them not quite visible to you. Unlike having cancer or being hurt in an accident, most people do not understand even a little about depression and anxiety and its effects, and of those that think they know, many are actually mis-informed.

In the spirit of informing those who wish to understand ... These are the things that I would like you to understand about me before you judge me...

Please understand that being sick doesn't mean I'm not still a human being. I have to spend most of my day in considerable emotional turmoil and exhaustion, fighting thoughts that make me feel insane and fighting the voice in my head that says you cant do this anymore just go. And if you visit I probably don't seem like much fun to be with, but I'm still me stuck inside this body. I may worry about life and work and my family and friends much more than the regular person, but I still want to know how your doing.

Please understand the difference between "happy" and "healthy". When you've got the flu you probably feel miserable with it, but I've been sick for years. I can't be miserable all the time, in fact I work hard at not being miserable. So if you're talking to me and I sound happy, it means I'm having a moment of remission. That's all. It doesn't mean that I'm not suffering, or that I'm cured, or any of those things. Please, don't say, "Oh, you're sounding better!". I am not sounding better, I am sounding happy and maybe even hopeful for the moment.

Please understand that being able to go out to my son's soccer game one night doesn't necessarily mean that I can do it the next time. I am greatful for the days that I can do those things but dont get mad the next time I say I really cant go out for dinner. With this illness it gets more confusing.

That's what Depression and Anxiety does to you. Please understand that Depression and Anxiety is variable. It's quite possible (for me, it's common) that one day I am able to walk to the park and back, while the next day I just want to stay close to home and sleep.

Please don't attack me when I'm ill by saying, "But you did it before!", if you want me to do something then ask if I can. In a similar vein, I may need to cancel an invitation at the last minute, if this happens please do not take it personally. Please understand that "getting out and doing things" does not make me feel better..

Please understand that if I say I have to sit down/lie down/take these pills now, that I do have to do it right now - it can't be put off or forgotten just because I'm out for the day (or whatever). Depression/Anxiety does not forgive. In many ways I depend on you - people who are not sick - I need you to visit me when I am too sick to go out... Sometimes I need you help me with the shopping, or staying out of my head. I may need you to take me to the doctor, or my counsellor or therapist. I need you on a different level too ... you're my link to the outside world... if you don't stay in contact with me because you think Im "too depressing" or want to be alone your wrong...,... and, as much as it's possible, I need you to understand me and not judge me. I judge myself enough. This isnt something I can just "snap out of"..if it was that easy do you not think I would have by now. If I could control this illness I would. I dont like to feel stuck in the bottomless pit of despair, I would rather be out and enjoying life, feeling free fromt he chains of my mind. I would like to be like you but Im not. I have had to accept this illness and I hope one day you can to because when I have your support and understanding Im stronger and have more hope and days of remission can be cherished with you.

link

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

Lily (8) has been off her face all day again - fun oh fun! the cats are napping and Steffi is in Sydney at a John Edwards show - I was meant to go too but had no-one to look after Lily as my mom's knees are acting up really badly at the moment. oh and my meds are still not working

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

When we lose someone - through death or a broken relationship - it is quite common for sadness, grief, or anxiety to emerge at some point. While it might seem like depression, grief is actually quite different.

Depression is marked by negative thoughts and feelings about oneself - low self-esteem and self-worth. Grief, on the other hand, is marked by distress over the loss of another or, in severe cases, overwhelming separation anxiety.

About a third of people experiencing grief go on to develop a depression, but it is usually weeks or months later. Loss can lead to changes in one's life - pleasurable things that were once done together, for example, are no longer done - and these in turn can lead to depression.

Counselling is usually the best treatment for grief. Some counsellors specialise in grief and loss counselling.

continued

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

When coping with a death, you may go through all kinds of emotions. You may be sad, worried, or scared. You might be shocked, unprepared, or confused. You might be feeling angry, cheated, relieved, guilty, exhausted, or just plain empty. Your emotions might be stronger or deeper than usual or mixed together in ways you've never experienced before.

Some people find they have trouble concentrating, studying, sleeping, or eating when they're coping with a death. Others lose interest in activities they used to enjoy. Some people lose themselves in playing computer games or eat or drink to excess. And some people feel numb, as if nothing has happened.

All of these are normal ways to react to a death.

What Is Grief?

When we have emotional, physical, and spiritual reactions in response to a death or loss, it's known as grief or grieving. People who are grieving might:

• feel strong emotions, such as sadness and anger


• have physical reactions, such as not sleeping or even waves of nausea


• have spiritual reactions to a death for example, some people find themselves questioning their beliefs and feeling disappointed in their religion while others find that they feel more strongly than ever about their faith

The grieving process takes time and healing usually happens gradually. The intensity of grief may be related to how sudden or predictable the loss was and how you felt about the person who died.

Some people write about grief happening in stages, but usually it feels more like "waves" or cycles of grief that come and go depending on what you are doing and if there are triggers for remembering the person who has died.

If you've lost someone in your immediate family, such as a parent, brother, or sister, you may feel cheated out of time you wanted to have with that person. It can also feel hard to express your own grief when other family members are grieving, too.

Some people may hold back their own grief or avoid talking about the person who died because they worry that it may make a parent or other family member sad. It's also natural to feel some guilt over a past argument or a difficult relationship with the person who died.

We don't always grieve over the death of another person. The death of a beloved pet can trigger strong feelings of grief. People may be surprised by how painful this loss can be. But the loving bonds we share with pets are real, and so are the feelings of loss and grief when they die.

All of these feelings and reactions are OK but what can people do to get through them? How long does grief last? Will things ever get back to normal? And how will you go on without the person who has died?

continued

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

Swimming with dolphins can be a therapy for people with depression, a new study finds.

Nature lovers or biophiles have long argued that interaction with animals can soothe a troubled mind but this claim has always lacked the scientific data to back it up.

Now UK psychiatrists publish the results of their randomised controlled trial in the British Medical Journal.

Dr Christian Antonioli and Professor Michael Reveley at the University of Leicester recruited 30 people in the US and Honduras who had been diagnosed with mild or moderate depression.

The severity of their symptoms was calculated according to established yardsticks for mental health, the Hamilton and Beck scales, which are based on interviews and questionnaires with the patient.

The volunteers were required to stop taking antidepressant drugs and psychotherapy for four weeks.

Half of the group was then randomly selected to play, snorkel and take care of bottlenose dolphins each day at an institute for marine sciences in Honduras.

The other half was assigned to a program of outdoor activities, also at the institute, that included swimming and snorkelling at a coral reef, but without the dolphins.

Two weeks later, both groups had improved, but especially so the patients who had been swimming with the dolphins.

Measurable symptoms of depression in the dolphin group had fallen by half and by two-thirds according to the two scales, twice as much as in the non-dolphin group.

In addition, a self-rating measurement of anxiety symptoms, the Zung scale, found a fall of more than 20% among the dolphin group, compared with a decline of 11% among the non-dolphin groups.

A first for dolphins

"To the best of our knowledge, this is the first randomised, single blind, controlled trial of animal-facilitated therapy with dolphins," say Antonioli and Reveley.

"The effects exerted by the animals were significantly greater than those of just the natural setting. The echolocation system, the aesthetic value, and the emotions raised by the interaction with dolphins may explain the mammals' healing properties."

Three months after the study, patients from both groups said their symptoms were still improved and did not need treatment.

Is biophilia the answer?

This suggests that in patients with mild or moderate depression, using drugs or conventional psychotherapy may not be necessary when biophilic treatment with animals is used, the scientists include.

Supporters of biophilia say that our affiliation with nature is an innate human tendancy. And disrupting that affiliation means tipping the equilibrium, so damaging our psychological health.

link

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

More than a fifth of the population has a genetic predisposition to major depression triggered by a string of stressful life events, Australian researchers announce.

These events include: the loss of a parent or other significant relative; a relationship breakdown; or employment, financial, housing and health crises.

The study, published in the latest issue of the British Journal of Psychiatry, found a gene that controls the neurotransmitter serotonin is crucial.

The researchers found that people with a 'short' version of the serotonin transporter gene have an 80% chance of developing clinical depression if they have three or more negative life events in a year.

People with a 'long', or more protective, version of the gene only have a 30% risk of becoming depressed under similar circumstances.

The study, by researchers from the University of New South Wales with affiliated research institutes and teaching hospitals, evaluated the relationship between genes and life experience from young adulthood into middle age in 127 teachers across 25 years.

It is the first study to account for the timing of the first onset of depression across the lifespan.

The long and the short of it

'Short' and 'long' versions of the serotonin transporter gene 5-HTTLPR, located on chromosome 17, are created by a slight variation in the sequence of DNA.

One version of the gene is inherited from each parent in certain combinations. According to the research, those who inherit two short versions are the most susceptible to depression.

The study showed 21% of us have two short versions of the gene, 26% two long versions and the rest have one long and one short variant.

Professor Philip Mitchell, head of the university's School of Psychiatry and convenor of Brain Sciences UNSW, emphasises that this is a susceptibility or risk gene not a disease gene.

"Having two short versions of the gene doesn't make you depressed per se; it increases the likelihood of becoming depressed if you experience stressful life events," he says.

Identifying who's at risk

Mitchell says the findings could help identify people at increased risk of depression and help direct resources into preventative interventions for people with the susceptible genetic make up.

"I think this will spark off important clinical debate about when tests like this should become clinically available," he says.

"The ethical question is not only whether this test should be made available publicly, but also who should have access to the results. We err on the side of privacy but private insurance bodies, for example, could demand the information as part of their risk assessment."

For information about depression, including support and referral options, see Australia's national depression initiative beyondblue, or depressioNet.

link

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.

For most people the passage of time helps rebuild lives after losing a loved one, but for others it may takeover their lives and need specific treatment, say Australian researchers.

Researchers from the Traumatic Stress Clinic at the University of New South Wales (UNSW) and Westmead Hospital are testing a new way to deliver cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT), a type of psychotherapy known to be effective for depression and anxiety.

Study leader, Professor Richard Bryant from UNSW, says 'prolonged grief disorder', which has recently been recognised as a significant clinical condition, requires a grief-specific form of CBT.

"In recent years there has been new interest in the finding that losing a loved one by death can cause real mental health problems," says Bryant.

"Most people initially experience intense sadness arising from longing or yearning for the deceased. But if these reactions persist six months after the death their grief can become complicated or stalled, preventing them from moving on with their lives."

Bryant says that there is considerable evidence that people with this disorder suffer marked impairment beyond the effects of depression.

Changing focus

Initial evidence from a trial involving 50 people suggests that people who received grief-specific CBT were more likely to resolve their grief reactions, than people who received traditional CBT.

"People with prolonged grief need help to resolve outstanding issues they may have about the death or about the person who has died, and learn to develop a new relationship with the person, which determines their capacity to cope in the future," says Bryant.

"We have learnt through research that people with prolonged grief are very much fixated on painful negative memories of the deceased.

"These people need to be getting access to memories that are reassuring rather than memories that are triggering further anxiety and depression."

Resolving issues

Grief-focused CBT engages participants in techniques such as writing letters to the person who has died, and having imaginary conversations with him or her in a highly structured way with the therapist.

"Talking through those issues, rehearsing them and having an appraisal helps people find a more constructive interpretation of the loss and of the future.

"Often when the memories of the death are dealt with, it is very important in therapy to then focus on new goal setting, developing new social networks, and structuring a daily or weekly schedule."

The researchers say the grief-specific treatment provides a promising alternative to counselling that may not be as helpful for people suffering from the longer-term effects of grief.

link

Originally published at catloverdoreen.net.